In 2016, when California went for Hillary, and it didn’t matter, I had the strongest emotional response of my life. I felt something had just caused more pain and injustice in that moment than the world had ever known, and I lost all ability to control my emotions. But since I was then a 59-year old male, the response from my then 88-year old father was that “Men don’t behave like that.”

And last week when I read that a young mother, a three-year old and two infants had perished together in the desert, I broke down, thinking of their suffering. (Nothing was said in criticism, but I knew.)

And when I heard about human beings, wanting nothing more than life, were forced to drink out of toilets for that “privilege”, again, the accumulation of anger and frustration was beyond my ability to restrain. Again, I felt the force of the words unspoken. (FWIW, I contribute a large percentage of my disability income to progressive causes. The reason I’m so often in the vicinity of my father is that I’m the 24/7/365 caretaker for both parents.)

But just maybe my father is finally starting to connect my concern for others with the abuse he heaped on me from my very earliest memories, giving his 2–5 year old (second) son beatings no adult man would deserve. Yes, when people need so badly, they find ways to express it. Though he will never acknowledge anything approximating responsibility, something behind those eyes seems to perhaps be getting the message; that beating (or otherwise abusing) small children will bottle up feelings that must come out sometime, somehow. Overly emotional, or excessively violent; they will come out. (Fortunately, I’ve never felt motivated toward violence, and my fight for justice takes all my energy.)

I sincerely hope there are readers of this article that get the message sooner, and in a far more loving manner.

Thank you for caring, and for sharing.